Since I have a fight coming up this weekend, I figured the easiest thing to write about this week would be that. Keep that in account as you read this. I haven’t had over 500 mg of sodium a day since Thursday, under 100 since Sunday, so my mind is kind of all over the place. Just bear with me.
One of the most common questions you hear when fighting is “Why?” As in, why do this to yourself? Why put yourself through all of this for? This is an easy question to answer, but not one that most can understand. For me, it’s mostly to learn about myself. I’ve probably learned way more about myself during the couple years of fighting than I ever did in the previous 30 years before that.
One of those things is how different I am from most people. There aren’t a lot of people out there willing to dedicate their lives to something in that way that I am. You can’t just do a few week fight camp every couple of months and expect to compete with people at a higher level. I’ve dedicated most of my life to this, not even just in the hopes of reaching the highest level, but understanding what it takes to get there. Most people I know are fine with just getting by at their jobs, in the hopes that they’ll move up in their profession just from showing up every day. I don’t really get that mindset. I can’t relate to people that don’t want to be the best at their job. Even when I’ve had jobs I hated, I still worked hard at them because that’s just how you get ahead in life.
Fighting has also helped me outside of the gym. I spend a decent amount of time breaking down my own performances in competition and practice, and that’s led to me doing the same thing outside of it. It seems like that’s a lost quality in this day and age. People are always so quick to judge others when they screw something up. Any time I see this, I end up asking myself, “Have I done something people could see as being equally stupid?” The answer is pretty much always yes lol. So who am I to judge anybody on anything. I’ve done my fair share of dumb things. I’ve done things that have hurt people I care about. But rather than blame the actions of others for those things, I started to look at how what I did led to some of those situations. It’s easy to play the blame card, but you’d be surprised what happens when you start to accept some of that blame yourself.
Now, is fighting easy? Hell nah, but it’s easier than living a life wondering what could have been. My path isn’t for everybody. That’s made apparent by the people in my life. I can’t be around weak people any more. I can’t be around people that want others to do the work for them, or just want to do things for the attention. I need people that will be ready to step up and meet challenges in life head on. I need people that want the best for themselves and those around them. So if we don’t talk or hang any more, don’t take it personally. I’m just doing what’s best for me.